Fun & Easy Ways To Treat Yourself

Fun & Easy Ways To Treat Yourself

Let’s face it, we can be too hard on ourselves sometimes. 

Whether it’s through our work, relationships or simply our daily lives, it’s safe to say that we can all be a little too impatient and a little too demanding of ourselves from time to time.

So why not take a moment to go easy on yourself? It’s one thing being ambitious and setting high standards for yourself, but it’s another being unrealistic and self-deprecating. 

So take a break from the ‘I should’ve done that better’ narrative in your mind and replace it with ‘I did my best, I’m happy about that’ one instead.

Oh and maybe give one of these a go below too:

Have a Bath

Photo by cottonbro on Pexels.com

It’s amazing how a hot soak and a few bubbles can make you feel like a new person (and a tinned prune) after 30 minutes. Even if you don’t have a bath, nothing beats a warm shower when you’re feeling a bit off. 

In fact studies have shown that a wade in some warm water can aid blood flow, improve immunity and boost your mood (plus more). 

DIY Pamper Session

Photo by Monstera on Pexels.com

Not solely reserved for teen girls at sleepovers, who doesn’t love slathering on their week-old avocado and mayonnaise concoction across their scalp whilst watching The Simpsons?

Seriously though, there’s nothing better than seeing the sun bounce off your scalp in the bakery window the next day after making your own hair mask. And don’t get me started on the self-made face masks……Haven’t you tried it?

Give this recipe a go for locks so luscious you’ll have people out with their garden pliers desperate to snip it off ya – Easy Hair Mask Recipes &. Easy Face Mask Recipes.

Yes of course you can go buy a hair mask in the shop but it’s not the same, there’s something to be said about creating your own and it actually working. As oppose to slapping on the shop bought goop only for it to leave your hair limp and lank…..sometimes! Just try the diy route….once…please!

Walk & Cafe Combo

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A lot of the time when we are ‘walking’ we are actually ‘sprinting’ from one place to the next. So really, the act of walking becomes more stress-inducing than stress-busting. 

But we can change this, at least in those moments when we actively choose to go for a walk and aren’t desperately trying to make it to the shops in time before they close. 

In one of my previous posts LINK HERE I share my own experiences of nature walks and I can personally say that it does you a world of good being outdoors for a bit of your day, in a casual fashion of course. 

And this brings me to my next point, cafe hopping is a great way of visiting different locations in your local area. It gives you a reason to go out and about even if you sometimes don’t feel like it. Who doesn’t want to walk in circles for 30 mins if it means that you’re guaranteed a slice of chocolate cake at the local bakery afterwards hehe. 

And even better, bring a friend along for the chit chat and pulled hamstrings as you race each other for the last lemon slice on the shelf. Honestly you’ll feel much better for it (walking outside for a bit, not getting the last lemon slice of course (ok, secretly yes). 

Movie Marathon 

Photo by Tima Miroshnichenko on Pexels.com

Harry Potter and the…….x, y and z…….are always my go to. Maybe you’re more of a Lord of The Rings kind of person or Pirates of The Caribbean??? Anyhow, we  both know that nothing beats putting your feet up and jumping into the world of cinema for a good part of the day.

Struggling to think of a movie to watch? Maybe one of these: 

Movie Marathon Ideas

Bake Off

Photo by Ivan Samkov on Pexels.com

Maybe you could challenge yourself to make something new once a month or maybe have a bake-off with your family or friends. It’s a win-win, if they make something better you can eat theirs, if you make something better you can eat yours and hide the rest from them, right?

Baking is a fun way to try new foods and it’s also relaxing…well….. not if your making soufflé I suppose. So maybe it’s best to start with cookies or something haha. 

Here are some ideas for inspiration:

Easy Baking Recipes

So there you have it, some ideas to keep you sweet if even for just a moment in time. 

Remember be kind to yourself, and don’t forget to wash that DIY hair mask out before getting too engrossed in Harry Potter’s wand! Hehehe

Most Embarrassing Moments – Internet Edition

Why some people openly share this kind of stuff is beyond me:

**I am not the owner of these stories/materials (thankfully)

Ice cream Andy

The Muffin

Hi, my name is…….

Meet ‘n’ greet

Love is Blind

GUILTY!

Teary Eyed

Watch Your Words!

**Thanks for reading, I can’t wait to share some of my embarrassing moments next time!

🤣 Rolling On The Floor Laughing Emoji

The Simple Way To Feel Better

Gosford Park, Northern Ireland

Sometimes the best things in life are the simplest. A stroll in the park, a sunbathe in the garden, a trip to the seaside. Yet, we as a society can easily overlook these little pleasures in life at times as we set our sights on the newest phone, the bigger house or the better car. Materialism has blinkered us from, in some respects, the value of simplicity, in nature, for example. 

And that’s what I’ve been thankful for in these last two years. Not the fact that the car has 4-wheel drive or my phone has the highest definition camera possible so that every pore in our faces can be seen (and then hidden by filters). But that I have the freedom to go outdoors and enjoy a walk in the park, nearby nature reserve or the coast. In knowing that free things can give me an even better buzz than receiving a new microwave from Amazon. (OK that doesn’t tickle my pickle either, but you see what I’m saying).

Let me preface this by outlining that I’m not the type of person to encourage all of mankind to sit in circles under cherry blossom trees braiding each others hair and singing ‘ Kumbaya’. But there is something to be said about the influence of being outdoors in a natural setting has on our overall well-being. it’s taken the dire situation we’ve all faced these last two years for me to wake up and literally ‘see the wood for the trees’. Perhaps I was in my own ‘concrete jungle bubble’ and never really saw the benefit or furthermore the necessity of being outside frequently. Sure I’d pop out to the nearby park for a picnic with friends but you wouldn’t find me eating trail mix on the forest hike at weekends all that often to be honest. Fast forward two years and it’s changed. I’m not saying I’ve calves of steel now from mountaineering or that i’m one of the ‘gym bunnies’ but….. I do feel different. I feel better.

Gosford Park, Northern Ireland

I feel healthier not just physically but mentally too. Before I’d say to myself ‘I don’t have time to go out at lunch as I’ve got too much work to do.’ Whereas now, I’m like a dog that got the zoomed and I’m practically running the walls to get outside by the time 1pm strikes. 

So why am I saying all this? Do I just want to gloat about how good I am at getting my 20,000 (-subtract 15,000) steps in daily? Of course not (yes), it’s just something that I’ve realised which has helped me a lot and which may be beneficial to you too if you feel stressed, fatigued, unhealthy…. This attitude that it is still possible to see the silver lining in the mushroom cloud albeit faintly.

So why not try to take a break from the desk at lunchtime to go outside to the local park? And if already do this or similar, good for your, your brain and body will thank you in the long run no doubt!

Some interesting fact regards being outdoors and well-being:

A Helpful Healer: Research has shown that patients who spent more time outdoors during their recovery in hospital needed less painkillers, experienced fewer complications and had shorter hospital stays. 

Mood Boosting: In one study in Mind, 95% of those interviewed said their mood improved after spending time outside, changing from depressed, stressed, and anxious to more calm and balanced. 

Mortality Moderator: In a 2011 study published in the Journal of the American College of Cardiology, time in front of a screen was associated with a higher risk of death, and that was independent of physical activity!  

– Improved Focus: Because humans find nature inherently interesting, we can naturally focus on what we are experiencing out in nature. This also provides a respite for our overactive minds, refreshing us for new tasks.

Take care

Why Haven’t I Written Anything In 4 Months?

If you’d thought I’d perished, fear not, for phoenixes rise from the ashes, and I from my bedroom once in a blue moon. What can I say? This sedentary state of mind and body takes its toll. But before I start quoting Confucius and reading palms I’ll adopt a more grounded tone of voice. 

So why have I really refrained from writing regularly these days? 

The short answer is, well…. I’m not quite sure. Yet, if you take time to look beneath the surface there’s a plethora of complexities working their magic on my blood cortisol levels. From a lack of motivation to feelings of inadequacy, in these last few months I’ve had both the knockbacks and privileges of feeling them all. 

If you are taking a break from something you once enjoyed then don’t beat yourself up about it and demand yourself to get back on the horse. Let the horse rest for a while (or just buy a new one). 

Digging a little deeper I can say that for a while I didn’t feel the urge to share my constant ramblings with anyone, be it friends, family or the next door neighbour. I wanted to be alone with my thoughts. Writing had lost its appeal for a while. Whether I was too preoccupied with the day job or simply just told myself this, one way or another my relationship with writing was strained. 

I think that’s part of the problem, at least in my experience, is that I’ve found that when I do something with the aim of trying to impress someone else that ‘thing’ loses its appeal and so I lose motivation to keep doing ‘it’. 

Whereas, when I find something to do which interests me and is for me wholeheartedly, I find that my motivation does not waver in the same way, if at all. 

And I think this is something I’ve only really come to realise this year. I don’t want to write to impress others, I want to write to enjoy the process of writing for myself. There’s a poignant difference in this realisation. 

Do you do something in particular for the approval of others or do you do it for the fulfillment in yourself? 

We spend our lives searching for ‘happiness’, thinking that our external reputations = success = happiness. But what if this is wrong? What if the recipe for happiness is intrinsic-growth = happiness? 

Who knows, all I know is that  I need a holiday……(where I can bask like a lizard and stress myself out on my sun lounger, pondering pensively within the murky depths of my mind. Just as I’m doing now, lying horizontally with my laptop on my windpipe. The comforts of  working from home, eh?) 

Overall, I don’t think I’ve given much detail as to why I’d stopped writing for so long, but one thing more important to note is that I didn’t stop permanently, because I would like to get back into it. Starting now.

And if you’re the only sad sod who’s bothered to read it this far then you must be in a far worse state than I am! Hahaha kidding!

Lookout for my next post which will most likely be about…..TBD hehe

You Are Unique, No?

Something which has fascinated me for quite some time is this shared feeling many of us have, a feeling of internal friction. A part of us is pulled towards wanting to feel unique and feel like an individual, while the other pushes us to want to fit in and conform. 

And so both forces, (as Yoda would say) act in opposite directions, leaving us in this stationary state where we stand shoulder to shoulder with one another in no man’s land. Not knowing whether to put a foot forward or backward, to hold the person’s hand beside us or to stand alone. Being human feels like much more than being flesh and bone, than having a soul. Societal baggage comes along for the ride, an additional freebie that no one is thankful for (well, at least not all of the time). 

To give a bit of context: I was listening to a podcast several days ago by a Spanish man who helps others learn the Spanish language through informal story telling (which is great, I think). And within the first 10 minutes of this particular episode he mentioned how your aim when learning a language shouldn’t be about wanting to ‘ sound like a native’ yet instead the focus should be on ensuring that you speak with clarity and that the message of which you are trying to convey is understood. So less about perfecting the accent and more about achieving clear communication.

This was a notable point in my mind, because it’s true, so many advertisements I see about languages always seem to be promoting the measure of success of language acquisition as being equated to sounding perfectly like a native. 

But is it really that important to sound like a native? No. Because then you are not sounding like yourself. Your accent + new language = a unique accent that nobody else on the planet could ever have. This is a special thing. We shouldn’t be trying to change our charms.  

His words resonated with me on many levels. If everybody aimed to sound the same and look the same we would lose any uniqueness, any quirks. Diluting ourselves is essentially losing ourselves I think. 

Anyhow, maybe I should lay off the herbal teas before bedtime……….

Yes, Positives Do Exist (Just Squint Harder And You’ll See)

With so much negativity festering daily, from scaremongering and sensationalising tabloids spitting doomsday ‘news’ into our turquoise surgical masked faces, to apocalyptic scenes in some of the local supermarkets. I wanted to flip this on its head, and dare I say, try and see some positives to this nightmare we all find ourselves desperate to awaken from. 

Is this my feeble attempt to sugarcoat reality or turn a blind eye to the obvious? No, of course not, but sometimes we need to take a minute and reflect on some good in order to continue soldiering through the challenges. 

And for that reason, I want to share with you some positives I have jotted down recently regarding the pandemic in an attempt that you too could relate. 

Will it plant a cheek-hurting smile on your mug allday? I think not, but perhaps for a millisecond or two, and that’s better than not at all, right?

So here goes:

Money Saving

I am not ignoring the financial hardships, again this point will be for a few not the majority. Many people have lost their livelihoods, or are struggling on furlough, I know this. Which is why I think it is important to remain hopeful that this nightmare will end this year. 

Some of us may have been able to save throughout this situation, perhaps you have returned to the parental home and are saving money by paying a decreased rent. Or maybe, for example, because the hospitality industry has been closed at different stages throughout the year you have managed to save money which otherwise would have been spent in restaurants and bars. Because, let’s face it, who would ever want to spend their money enjoying themselves *wink wink.

Perhaps this situation presented you with an opportunity to kickstart your own business. New ideas may have arisen as a direct result of these circumstances perhaps. Or maybe, simply, you’ve had the time to forge a solid business plan, thrown caution to the wind and just given it a go. 

Family Time

Although the novelty definitely wears off, I can say that the support and company of my parents, and vice versa this last year has had more positives than negatives. Of course the pleasantries fade into the abyss by the second week of living under their roof, with their ways of life mimicking that of a stoned three-toed swamp sloth. It’s no lie that I have wanted  to take them on in the boxing ring, but overall I think spending time with family is something that should not be underestimated. Having company is definitely something that’s overlooked by us all at times. There’s nothing wrong with living on your own, so long as you can still catch up with friends and family, right? But definitely, in these times I think closeness with people is needed more than ever. Love you Ma and Da (they never read this sh*t)!

Perhaps you are a parent yourself and have found that this situation has given you the opportunity to spend more time at home with your partner and/or children. Maybe you have created more memories as a result. Hopefully happy ones!

As social beings, I think having company and companionship is only ever a good thing. Which is what makes this situation sort of bitter/sweet , after several months you grow to hate your family and crave socialising with your cool friends haha! But deep down family is important in my opinion.

Location Change = Less Stressful City Lifestyle

Ofcourse, this one is location dependent and based on your preferences as an individual. In my situation, I moved out of the city of London and into my parents’ shoebox of a home. Which despite its modest size it still manages to swamp the non-existent space you get in the matchbox city apartments of the UK’s capital, might I just add! 

Like any city, there are both pros and cons to the types of lifestyles they offer in them. I do like the atmosphere and amenities on my doorstep but the flipside is, do I miss overcrowding, sprinting off trains like racing greyhounds, or overpriced below-quality accommodation and products? I guess not, atleast not at the moment. 

So by being away from the ‘hustle and bustle’ of the city I have been able to take my head out of the sand and say ‘ no, no I do not miss the stress of the commute’ as I travel from my bed to my desk in my pink thermal pyjamas.

My blood pressure has thanked me too. 

Learn To Value Health More – Physical & Mental

It’s not that things like getting a haircut and saving the world’s economies are not important (in that order). But I think obviously the core of this crisis is the concern it poses to health on a mass scale. 

This risk to our physical health has taken a toll on our mental health, I believe this is fair to say, would you? Both are as important as eachother, yet one is always overlooked. I will leave this to you to decide.

The bottom line is, perhaps this is the time to truly put ‘health’ in its many aspects in the spotlight, and not focus on making more money or building  a more impressive reputation. Perhaps the importance should be on looking after ourselves. 

And not just in moments when we are physically sick, but in the moments physically well too. 

Not just in the moments where we feel physical pain, but in moments of mental pain too. 

I think it’s easy to overlook our own well-being and place more priority on widening our wallets. But ultimately what is a million in the bank really about if you are stressed or depressed, or physically unwell as a result of your quest to be rich?

My point is self-care has become a much more apparent thing to me, our mental and physical health is overlooked until a health scare abruptly enters our lives. 

We work ourselves into the ground to save money which we won’t see until we are pensioners, or instead, we work ourselves into the ground so that we can retire before we are of pension age. 

I have no issue with strong work ethics but a question I asked myself is – what value of money is my health worth?

We should treat ourselves better more often, we can be too hard on ourselves at times.

 Why obsess with always chasing the future plans, doesn’t that mean you will never really be enjoying the present?

Take more care of yourself is my bottom line!

If you are  feeling down, perhaps do as I did and take a moment to reflect on how much strength you have had in getting through this situation thus far. Perhaps even jot down some positives as I have done above. 

Personally, I felt alot better when I did this, and I am sure that you will too. 

Take care

Natasha

‘Tis The Season To Be (Un)Motivated

Has everybody’s motivation to do something productive been pretty much thrown overboard, and chained to a concrete block the size of a small car destined to sink to the bottom of the Mariana Trench never to see the light of day again?

Or is that just me?

As a human being I like to take the easy road, watching TV and eating cake seems like a  much more viable option than scratching my head over a 12-paged tax form, or job application, or be it pretty much anything these days. 

And has the shame set in? You can answer that yourself. 

Infact, even the simplest of tasks have become a strain, signing a birthday card feels like I’m signing away a piece of my own unmotivated flesh. Making dinner feels like I’ve opened the gates of Hell. Sweating profusely over a stove morning, noon and night because you’ve had to substitute for your mum, who is such a fantastic cook that she manages to burn water. I  might as well stick my head in the oven for the amount of times I’ve been scraping the overcooked rotisserie chicken off the back of it these days! 

You may grimace at my squabbling over life’s little pleasures, while I assure you my face remained motionless on the date on which I conjured this jargon up. Expressionless, as my heart pours these words onto this page like spilled milk on the breakfast table. 

At least I’ve been somewhat productive on a microscale, I suppose. Wrapping up overly-expensive gifts for someone you mildly like in your family must stand for something right? Wearing pyjamas on a 5-day streak must be medal-worthy, no? Oh, who asked you anyway!

I’ve found myself recently trying to find the positive in the tiny achievements. Small steps at a time. It’s the only way I’ve been keeping my head out of the sand, out of the clouds and out of the oven I mentioned to you earlier if you’d be so kind to remember. 

Let me lay out some examples for you before I become unmotivated to write anymor…….

Boredom-Busting Ideas

I’ve been trying to find new ways to keep myself occupied, especially since ‘winter is coming; and we all know what that entails. Stomach ulcers from too much hot tea drinking and cold sores from too much mistletoe snogging (well perhaps not this year mind you).

Anyway the fact is I’m finding that boredom is fast becoming that unwelcome guest in my mind a little too often and so I thought I’d share with you some ideas which have kept me entertained if all for the wrong reasons. 

Baking

Sounds good on paper, the final product never quite looks like the picture however. As it’s almost halloween I thought it would be nice to make halloween themed cupcakes, which would’ve worked out fine if I was going for the theme of roadkill.

Exercise

In my life, there never really is that right moment to drop and give you 50.. Exercise is painful, pain is something I’d quite like to avoid strangely enough. Yet in saying this, I have found myself in moments of disillusion hopelessly attempting to follow these popular Youtube pilates people while perspiring profusely. 

Nature Walks

It’s all fun and games until I tred in dogsh*t. Autumn, in particular, is a great time to go walking in sh*t, the leaves are burnt orange and crimson, the sun sits low in the frosty sky. So many picturesque moments are just destined to be ruined by dogwalkers! (joke) :p 

ASMR

I’m obsessed with this stuff, I don’t need drugs, sex or rock ‘n’ roll, I save these antics for weekends. Weekdays are spent in a euphoric state of catharsis, as Gentle Whispering ASMR pretends to give my spotty face a health-spa grade facial. ASMR is like marmite, some love it , some hate it. Forget marmite, it’s the elixir of life for saddos like me who never got hugged enough as kinder!

Book Reading

Fed up of scrolling on instagram, I’ve decided on the seldom occasion to brush off the cobwebs on some of my books. I boast a humble collection of a handful of books, not like those show-off shelves everybody seems to be sporting on their zoom calls these days. An old favourite I’ve picked up, and ultimately max out reading at the half hour mark is titled ‘Blackbox Thinking’ by Matthew Syed, in my opinion, it really is worth the read if you think failure is a negative, it changed my mindset for the better, it may change yours too.

So that was just some of the ideas I;ve been mulling over/ giving a go in the last couple of months. And on writing this I realise I already mentioned most of these in my previous post. 

Oh well, recycling things helps the planet doesn’t it?

I hope you’re trying to keep boredom at bay currently too, it’s not easy at times but atleast we can try, right?

It’s Been A While…….

There are people posting videos of themselves climbing their stairwells enough times they’re making Everest appear like little more than a speed ramp in comparison. And here I am struggling to get up in the morning and ‘head to work’ five footsteps from my bed. 

But really, I must admit, and like many others (which is reassuring) and maybe even you, I have failed miserably at meeting any of my ambitions I had set out on an A4 page minutes before the world went into lockdown.

Here are just a few feeble facades  which fondly faded away into the abyss of my foggy mind:

  1. ‘Learn a new language’ – before lockdown I could say ‘hola’, half a year into lockdown and I’m still just saying…….’hola’. 
  1. ‘Get fit’ – why do we torture ourselves? Can we just give this gig up. Most of us are simply not fitness freaks fanatics, so let’s stop kidding ourselves, put down the dumbbells and pick up the popcorn. 
  1. ‘Skill up’ – yes taking on a new course is exciting for about 1 minute. Until the pre-filmed lecturer with his monotone drole puts you to sleep faster than your local anaesthetist. 
  1. ‘Self care’ – well atleast I now give my hair 100 strokes of a fine-toothed comb everyday. That’s something, right? But try to force me to wear anything other than my miss-matching tracksuit bottoms and farmer’s fleece and we’re having a fight. 

You get my drift, some people may look back at lockdown and see the silver lining in the mushroom cloud, several online certifications under their belt, a new haircut, a new zest for life. Meanwhile I’m the runt stuck in yet an even bigger rut. If there was ever a time to learn how to f*cking crochet, it has come and gone! And guess what, I still haven’t taken out those knitting needles, (do you even use needles)! 

So what exactly do I spend my time doing these days when I’m not wallowing in self-pity or stuffing my face with fried foods, you ask?

I’m still trying to figure that one out to be quite frank.  

When Will The Summer Arrive?! :(

If you find yourself clutching onto a hot water bottle as if it were a life-saving hand at the top of a cliff which had your death sealed on it. Then you must only be in Northern Ireland in the height of its scorching summer at 14 degrees Celsius (on a good day).

 

Yes today is the day of the whinge, I haven’t seen the sun in 6 weeks, and I’m starting to have major withdrawal symptoms. So desperate am I to feel its rays caress my casper-like skin that I’ve started layering on the factor 50+ at midnight and adorning the sunglasses while peering at the moon from my french-bay windows begging it to metamorphose into its much hotter cousin. 

 

Where art thou sunlight? Summer in this country occurs for one day, and one day only. Normally in May, whilst you’re waiting in the healthcentre for them to check if the bed sores you are developing are caused  by a serious medical condition or just because you’re too lazy to walk your mutt in the piss-pouring rain.

 

 As you uncomfortably sweat from every orifice in your being as the sun plays peek-a-boo behind the cumulonimbus for all of about 4 seconds, you second-guess whether you should get the shorts on and the BBQ lit when you leave the cesspit of infestation a.k.a. the local healthcentre we all love to hate. 

 

The ‘Great British’ weather really isn’t all that great. It’s always essential to dress for all 4 seasons in the one day. So that means a crop top, flip-flops combo, coupled with a raincoat and set of hat, scarf and gloves all being sported before you’ve had your morning cereal. 

 

And with this, it’s time to throw on the Ski-jacket and cycle shorts for a trip to the soggy beach!

Poem – ‘Try’

Swallowing pride,

Suppressing suggestions of surrendering,

To the doubts damning me from within.

 

An attempt to achieve,

Guised more as an attack on my ego,

Failure must be coupled with Cheshire cat’s grin. 

 

To try,

An action well-known to the brave.

Yet not even an acquaintance of I nor him. 

 

Trying to try,

Should be an accolade in itself,

With the focus on winning being second to this.

I’m Motivated At Being Unmotivated

I’ve become really unmotivated lately. I find sticking to schedules more painful than the thought of chewing shards of bottlegreen glass as if they were cornershop penny chews. 

 

Working remotely at my 9 to 5 is doable, but it’s the goals I have outside of this (as we all have) which I feel completely uncompelled to partake in. It’s so frustrating, here I am at 1 minute past 5pm, I should be jumping for joy at the thought of going for a workout in the garden or getting better at my language learning. 

 

Yet instead, much to my disappointment, I find myself crawling into the pyjamas and making the greasiest pile of shite for dinner, followed by a helpful dose of ‘Botched’ for dessert. (If anyone has watched this show, let me tell you now, do not eat a damn thing mid-watch. For it’’ll be hitting your ceiling via projectile vomit well before you have even had  a chance to take a second bite. Let’s just say the graphic scenes in this reconstructive surgery show would make roadkill look like a pageant Queen. And with that, I’ll say no more). 

 

Anyway, as I allow the daylight hours to fall through my hands like sands at the seaside, the guilt begins to wash over me – normally around 1am when my head hits the pillow. I’ve just wasted yet another day’, unfortunately this is the all too familiar opening dialogue of my monologue rant that I play through most nights of my very lack-lustre days. ‘Why didn’t I try harder, do I not care enough about succeeding, do I not have enough passion for these so-called ‘goals’ of mine?’  

 

I fall asleep under the waves of annoyance and frustration. Forgiving myself monetarily as I work at the dayjob only to start the cycle all over again as the sun begins to set. Why do I bother having ‘goals’ if I can’t be bothered to put in the effort to achieve them?

 

Are they really not things that I truly want? Am I just trying to achieve them to impress other people? Do I have too many goals simultaneously and perhaps the pressure of this ask is too much that my subconscious simply rejects them all in a desperate attempt to keep my cortisol levels mildly below fFreaking the f*ck out’? Who knows. I wish I had the answers. 

 

I spend alot of time thinking, and not enough time doing, Maybe perhaps this is the real crux of it all. The cure to all of my problems, and much much more. Human beings – procrastinators sitting pretty in their suits of skin and bone. So perfectly imperfect, we have the minds to create goals, and the minds to prevent them happening. 

 

Where the f*ck is my self-help book off Amazon, I think it’s perfect timing for a read of the blurb as a bit of light bedtime reading before I pass out whilst skimming over the introduction about the author.

 

I hope you’re achieving your goals as I sit and blabber about the fact that I’m about as far away from mine as the 2 poles are from eachother on this Godforsaken planet. Or then again, maybe knowing that you’re struggling too will give me a sense of sweet sweet schadenfreude as I stare aimlessly through my bay windows sipping unsweetened tea when really I should be working on my tax returns. 

 

Either way, goals can be achieved, and they can be unachieved. Formed and removed. The choice is mine. Today I may choose to not put effort in, and tomorrow I may choose to do the opposite. Outcomes change, when I change my actions. Actions change when I change my attitude. My attitude changes when I change the words I tell my own mind. 

 

And with this it’s time to put away my tiny violin if only for a moment, and put these words into action (tomorrow ofcourse :p). 

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