Doomsday Dating Apps

Dating applications – where to begin…..

I develop a headache as soon as I start to think about them.

They say that we shouldn’t judge a book by it’s cover but isn’t that exactly what we’re doing on those platforms? If Timmy’s hairline recedes so much as a millimetre too far on the upper left temple he’s getting a left swipe quicker than he can coif his combover in one fell swoop. Bit harsh, isn’t it? But let’s not pretend like this isn’t reality.

This is just one reason why I detest dating apps, it’s too easy to not give somebody a chance. Am I saying we need to marry a toad, no of course not, but at least give the guy/woman a chance to prove that they’re less amphibious than you’d assumed at first glance. Afterall photos can do us wrong, we all know this! ‘You don’t get a second chance to make a first impression’ as the old saying goes. Well I think dating app designers have taken this criteria and ran with it to the hills. Along with snatching that little bit of self-esteem you so desperately scrambled to keep grasp of.

It’s happened to me many a time, you’re flat out ghosted by the hot-guy after messaging for a long-weekend, turns out he just wanted your nudes and to never meet in person (convenient). And let’s not forget the guy I called an ‘alien’ in jest because he misspelt a word and I said it looked like an ‘alien language’. Only for him to burst into a frantic text rant calling me quote ‘a man face’, ‘a man in a wig’. Um….yeah…..thank you E.T. and what’s so bad if I were? Time for the mothership and you to beam back up to planet of the morons.

Oh I’ve had the bad and the ugly, so tell me – when exactly is the good coming along? No, you know what, who wants the good , when is the GREAT coming along? Where’s the UK’s answer to Adonis, huh?

In the next post I’ll share my mishaps and honeymoon phases with some wonderfully unwondeful men on some dating apps. But for now, let’s have a look at some cracking comments which pretty much sum up what the majority of us are thinking ref. doomsday dating apps:

(I own none of these comments by the way, just incase someone comes after me for copyright reasons hehe).

“Modern dating has become a competition to see who’s allowed to care the least and get away with it.”

How do we feel about this? Do you agree/disagree/ on the fence? It struck me a bit because there’s truth to it, well at least in my experience of the dating circus. Where is the chivalry, the courtship? It’s arguable that many don’t even want to date anymore let alone be in a relationships, but still want all the perks as if they were. I’m not giving you the goodies if you’re not looking to do the groceries with me, simple as that sunshine! Haha I just wrote this because it sounds good, but really, good things are worth working hard for, and 100% you should value yourself and know that you’re worth more than being someone’s sex doll and plus one to a party.

Of course everyone has a right to lead their life how they so choose, and who am I to judge if someone wants fling after fling, I just know that in my experience the ones who came ‘a knockin’ for the booty call aren’t exactly going to be the listening ear or shoulder to cry on for life’s more deeper moments. So tell me, what type of company do you want to keep in your life? Why not have someone who cares deeply for you and can do all the fun sexy stuff as a bonus as oppose to the individual who only wants to spend time with you for one thing, and one thing only?

“..almost everyone is a charming prospect so long as we know NOTHING about them!”

Well, a bit of a glass half empty approach if you ask me, but I see what they’re saying. Ultimately, we’re all imperfect because we’re all human (expect that guy who went ham on me on the dating app remember him?). And that’s totally normal, but I suppose we’re all different ‘recipes’ and in this person’s eyes some are…uh… tastier than others! Hahah oh I don’t know what I’m saying! I think the halo effect does cast a spell over someone who you’re physically attracted to in the beginning, and yeah, maybe we like someone for their looks but then they turn out to be hideous on the inside. Let’s just hope you can figure this out early on and not waste your time, energy or emotions on the wrong person/people. You just have to keep trying, that’s my motto. I think with experience you narrow down what you want in a romantic partner and what you don’t want.

“Dating apps have destroyed this generation’s relationship building skills. Because the second things go south they just hopped right back on those sites and can find a replacement very easily.”

It can make a person feel disposable, expendable. Which doesn’t exactly do wonders to the self-esteem, I can vouch for this. With the lack of face-to-face interaction we can choose to be cutthroat and just delete the message as if it wasn’t from a real person. It’s sad, because beneath the profile is a real person, with emotions. And let’s be honest, putting ourselves out into the dating field is in a way, being a bit vulnerable, we expose ourselves to judgment, to rejection, to a rollercoaster of emotions on our quest to find someone. it can make you feel like you don’t matter, which of course isn’t true. It’s just the design of the platform. With so many people, so many profiles, all you have is mere seconds to make an impression on somebody with your profile picture and one-liner. So the odds are stacked up, it’s not impossible, but what I mean is don’t beat yourself up about it. You just have to keep trying. Perhaps if dating apps don’t work out you may even meet the right person ‘organically’, like they do in the movies, down the supermarket aisle shopping for semi-skimmed milk haha you just never know! One thing for sure about dating apps, and dating in general is that you do meet such a range of personality types and with this you learn not only more about other people but also more about yourself. And this could never be a bad thing, right? So to me each experiences are either a lessons or a blessings, perhaps you could see it from this perspective too if it helps you.

*dating app deleted (until next time).

Published by Natasha

Hey! I'm Natasha, I enjoy writing about my own and reading other people's experiences/perspectives about this crazy world we live in!

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