Tag: blog
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Being Called A C*nt By A Stranger
It’s not everyday that you can indulge in the luxury of having off-the-cuff profanities spat at you on a public street whilst on your daily commute home from work. So given that exactly this unfolded this very evening makes me really want to count my lucky stars and thank God for all of the socially…
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The Arrival…..
From the Coronavirus to Storm Ciara, it feels like judgement day has well and truly arrived. I helped an old lady cross the road last week, so for that alone I’m sure Jesus will bless me with the golden ticket straight up the squeaky escalator to Heaven and by doing so ensure that the fiery…
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A Poem About Love
Love. Imaginary, or a force of nature? Like the idea of ‘consciousness’. Are they both just falsehoods, Or truly realities experienced by those favoured? Love. As comforting as a hot bowl of soup, On a cold frosty evening. In its absence we are all but, Lost souls, floating on rafts destined for sinking. …
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The Gym – Satan’s Second Home
Not much of the athletic type, the only way you’ll get me running is in the opposite direction from you if you start going into a long-winded spiel about the weather or how you’re deeply madly in love with your cousin twice removed for that matter. With that being said, I think my wispy body…
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Are We Truly Selfish Or Kind?
Altruism – “Having or showing an unselfish concern for the welfare of others.” Do you think you’re a nice person? And by this, self-validation in the form of saying “thank you” to the cashier and “hello” to your neighbor I’m afraid doesn’t quite cut it. This question springs to my mind in light of a…
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Poetry: Change
A leopard can change its spots. But cheetahs never do. Changing your mind is one thing. But changing your heart, is about as easy as making a mountain move. 2020 A new year, a new you. This year will be different. A false promise? Or does here lie the truth? Do you need…
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Volunteering: Help Others And You Help Yourself
They say the best way to feel better about yourself is through helping others. And in no act is this more clear than that of voluntary work. ‘Volunteering’ can refer to a smorgasboard of activities. Whether you simply take an old dear’s chihuahua out for a walk or wash the windows for your neighbour, the…
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Happy New Year To You, Not I
I hope you’re having a pleasant start to the new year, if not then I hope revelling in my misfortunes will have you grinning from ear to ear like a Cheshire cat. Having just about set foot inside my grotty London flat on the 1st Jan after a rather heart-palpitation inducing flight from Northern…
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Amazon’s Worst Christmas Gifts Ever
Well, there we have it, Christmas is over for yet another year. No one wanted the tangerine in the stocking, but I think we’d take it over these gift mis-haps, don’t you? 1. A Box Of ‘Nothing’ Quite literally a box of absolutely nothing. Why why why would you buy this? Customer Review 4.1 out…
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My Mystery Dining Experience
Sherlock Holmes eat your heart out for I think you’ll find that I’m the true detective when it comes too all things ‘mysterious’. Well, atleast when it comes to secret dining that is. Having recently signed up to a mystery dining program in the last couple of months, I’ve had the pleasure of casting my…
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Poem: Winter
Cheeks flushed crimson, Embers crackle, As the smoke billows beyond the seams of the Oak smoked door. A faint glow from within the forest, The little cottage. Offering temporary relief, From a permanent frost. Brave the wind, the rain and the snow. A feat too difficult for now. Yet a necessity for…
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She Threatened To Smash My Face In
Who walks into a shop to buy some Christmas baubles for their tree and instead has ‘you’re a f*cking b*tch’ screamed into their face as ‘Jingle Bell’s’ plays in the distant background? Only yours truly ofcourse! Nothing reminds me more of the season of giving than being on the receiving end of the odd curse…
The Neon Squid 